Secrets in the Dark
by Rhubarb
Summary: This is only the first 8 chapters of a yet unfinished story. Contains supernatual content which insn't really scary but, I thought better mention it. This story closely follows Snape and most events are seen through his perspective. R&R please!
1. The touch of Darkness

A/N: My first chapter of my first fanfic…here goes…please read and review, thank you.  
  
Disclaimer: All characters belong to J.K. Rowling, only the story line is my own.  
  
  
  
Secrets in the Dark  
  
- Part One  
  
Snape ruffled the papers against his desk so that they sat roughly evenly. He placed the pile on a spare place on his desk & groaned in exasperation as he glanced at the rest of the tests left for him to mark. 'Why do I bother?' He thought sharply to himself.  
  
Professor Severus Snide Snape, potions master and Head of Slytherin house at Hogwarts. He lived alone in one of the dungeons at Hogwarts School of Witchcraft & Wizardry. The cold, dark, uninviting dungeon suited his personality perfectly. He liked it in his dungeon, it was the only place where he could just be by himself, without other people hassling him & trying to cheer him up. He kept to himself & was happy that way.  
  
Snape gave up on marking the papers, & decided to sleep now, it was almost 4:30a.m. He would finish the rest in the morning. He blew out the lone candle, which had the responsibility oh lighting the whole room. …Darkness…just as he liked it…  
  
  
  
He swiftly burst into the dim classroom. The babble of voices immediately halted. Snape advanced to the front of the room and turned abruptly to face the apprehensive students. Snape slowly picked up the papers, which he had spent so many hours marking. He eyed the class suspiciously. He smoothly glided forward, giving the impression that his feet hardly touched the floor. Snape passed Neville Longbottom & carelessly left the boys test on the desk. "You shall never amount to anything, Longbottom" he said emotionlessly as he passed, causing the boy to whimper. Snape continued to walk along the rows of students, giving each back their test, occasionally making a side comment about their appalling lack of knowledge. Without warning, Snape stopped in front of Hermionie Granger. He gave her a look, which made her quite obviously shiver, her face turned pale, she was waiting for him to say she failed. She seemed to be fighting back tears, Snape could feel the power, which he held, he could make these children afraid, embarrassed, and guilty, or even make them cry. This thought made Snape's lips curl with victory. Then he said with prudence, "Well done, Miss Granger, obviously some students do bother to do their study." Hermione let out a sigh of relief as a tear rolled down her cheek.  
  
Snape continued his lesson in his usual manner, criticizing each student at least once. Except Malfoy, of course. Draco Malfoy, the only good student in the class. He wasn't the smartest, that was definitely Hermionie, or the bravest, no, that was the pesky Potter brat, or the funniest, that was the good for nothing Ron Weasly (although, Snape didn't really like humor anyway, much too immature for him). Why did Snape have a certain liking for Malfoy then? Because Snape saw himself as a child in the young boy, the same cold, demanding parents, the same strong manner, the same need to bully people to feel good about himself. In fact, if it hadn't been for Malfoy blonde hair and gray eyes, he very well could have been him!  
  
Finally the class ended & there was a bustle for the door, Snape didn't blame them for wanting to leave, & he was glad they didn't want to stay! He didn't really like talking much at all, let alone being a person responsible for participating in a conversation.  
  
Snape cleared up the mess left from when Neville Longbottom & Seamus Finnigan's cauldron exploded with a swift flick of his wand. 'Small minded infants!' He snapped to himself. He liked incompetent students least of all! Snape left the room and locked the door behind him. He made his way through the deserted corridors, his black cape billowing silently behind him.  
  
The tall Potions Master was familiar with the damp, dark tunnels, which weaved their way under the great hall, to his dungeon. Snape let himself into his quarters, the smell of stale air hung over the room. He breathed it in as if it were flowers in spring, savoring the familiar scent, which he recognized as the smell of safety. Nobody here to judge him, make him feel like an unwanted cockroach, nobody hatefully staring at him, just him, alone, solitude, peace…  
  
But, now he thought about it, he could still feel their beady eyes glaring at him. He walked over to the small mirror, which hung above the fireplace, merely for decoration rather than for looking in. He was quite disgusted with the reflection that he saw, so he quickly changed his focus so he was still looking in the mirror, but not at himself. He found his gaze had landed on…eyes? He spun around abruptly to look directly at what he had seen. But there was noting there, in fact there wasn't much more in the whole room other than a bed, couple of shelves stacked with books & potions, a spindly wooden chair, & a large oak desk that was covered in papers. A shiver pricked the back of his neck. 'No!' he resolved, 'I just need to sleep.' Snape blew out the singular flame & lay down on the hard bed, with only a sheet for warmth. He thought about what he had thoughthe had seen, but he quite easily decided that he only ithought/i he had seen eyes because of the bad lighting in the room & his lack of sleep.  
  
Snape lay there for quite while, with no great desire to sleep, he thought of sleep as a waste of time, why people chose to lose one third of there life unconscious he couldn't understand. He often used this time to think. Whilst he was lying motionless on he bed, he heard the noise similar to that of the swishing of a cloak. But nobody ever came down past his dungeon, especially not this late at night! Snape strained his ears to hear if there was someone else in his room. Then he felt something icy touch his forehead. His heart jumped and his eyes jolted open. His pupils dilated so as to let in as much light as possible, but this was a hopeless action. There was no light down this deep underground and his only source of manufactured light had been extinguished long ago. Snape took in a deep breath of heavy air and, gathering all the courage he could muster, reached up in front of him. To him, time seemed almost to play in slow motion. For a moment, nothing…then, a sudden rush of freezing air engulfed both his hands! Not just freezing, but horribly thick and it sent a heart stopping sense of ilifelessness/i searing up through his arms into his tight chest. He could not move, for fear and shock had taken over his body. 'It' left his hands and forehead, and maybe for the first time in his life, Snape was pleased to feel the warmth. He was afraid, an emotion which had not taken posession of him for many years now. He felt inferior, vulnerable, helpless, and scared. His memories of the last time he had felt this way consumed his mind, and he forgot he was not, still, back in his past…….  
  
  
  
iJames Potter, Sirius Black, Peter Pettigrew, Remus Lupin & Severus Snape, five 7th year boys, were sitting together in the bright daylight, bathing in the warmth of the afternoon sun. It was not often now that they could just sit without their minds full of worry, and now was no exception. Lord Voldermort was strong. Although, Professor Dumbledore, the highly trusted transfiguration teacher, were continuously telling them not to try and take this on themselves & to leave it to proper authorities. The five boys knew something that nobody else did. They had tried to tell the Headmaster of the school, Professor Dippet, but he had shoed them away & dismissed their information as silly childish insecurities. But what they knew was a very serious issue! They had seen …Darkness, & Darkness had touched James, had drawn on him a mark. A Dark Mark. James had described it as having felt as if it were burning when the Darkness…Voldermort…had inscribed the mark in his skin, felt it pierce into his veins. Sirius, Peter, Remus & Snape, were now constantly protecting their dear friend from further attack. They were not safe anywhere, and even James himself, was a threat. Often lashing out at the people who were closest to him, talking in a voice not his own, throwing things at them when they were trying to calm him down. Sometimes even talking a language unfamiliar to them, pointing at them with his wand, emptiness in his usually warm, kind eyes. Each day the boys knew James less and less, as his condition worsened, it was begining to be too dangerous to even be around him at all.  
  
All five boys were sitting pensively on the low stone when Lily Evans, a beautiful girl with red hair and green eyes, approached them. Severus noticed Lily step up to them and quickly stood to greet her. The other four boys, realizing that she was standing there, each stood up also. They all talked for a short while, but the conversation ran dry so Remus, Sirius and Peter sat back down to continue to sort through their abundance of thoughts. Severus and James however remained standing. It was plainly evident that Severus held emotions for Lily, so as they all walked, James courteously walked a few paces behind. Although James understood how Severus felt and didn't not have a problem with giving the pair space, he felt an urge in the pit of his stomach to walk up to them, stand between them, stop Severus talking to this girl!!! James didn't really understand where this feeling was coming from, but this feeling was to strong for him to overcome. He briskly waked up and nudged a space between them for him to squeeze into. Lily and Severus's conversation abruptly ceased. James could sense the discomfort and thought he could detect resentment flying at him, 'how dare they resent him? He was better than either of them!!!' James felt a surge of fury soar up from his feet and wash over his entire body. He turned his head to glare at Severus. Severus noted the emptiness in James' eyes. Both boys drew their wands, one with the mind to attack the other with the mind to defend. Lifting his wand, James started to utter words, words that had no meaning to Severus's ears, yet sent fear & pain shooting through his veins. Severus fixed James' gaze and began muttering a counter-curse focusing with all his might and employing more strength than he knew he possesed. James could see that Severus was too strong, how could he steal life force from this boy if not by the spell…? He couldn't, although, James was struck by a sudden brilliance, he would take the girl's life force instead, leach off her energy and power. She would be theirs…his and the Dark Lords! James leapt forward and grabbed Lily around the waist as he promptly vanished, as if into thin air. /i 


	2. Detention in the Dungeons

A/N: Second chapter is here! Thank you to those who kindly reviewed my story so far, it helps to keep me going and it means a lot to me. So thank you to 'Minerva Lupin' (whoever you may be), Lari (a.k.a. Elf), Sarah and KT, you guys are soooo special!  
  
Disclaimer: As I stated before, none of these characters are mine, they are all J.K.R.'s, I only own the story line.  
  
  
  
1  
  
2 Secrets in the Dark  
  
2.1 - Part Two  
  
Professor Snape awoke the next morning, feeling quite disorientated. He jerked upright to take in his surroundings. The memories which had been haunting his sleep that night had laid, untouched, unrecognized for the past seven years, and now, suddenly, the were dancing around in his mind, clear as crystal. Snape swung his feet of the bed so that they rested on the floor, the coldness of the stone beneath his feet brought forward in his mind the recollection of the night before - the coldness that had touched him. Could it have been the very same as what had got a hold of Harry Potter's father? Certainly not, Snape concluded thoughtfully. For James had described the touch as burning! Snape, although still a little shaken from the night of hard memories, easily buried his inner insecurities. He prepared himself to face yet one more miserable day of his wholly miserable life, or, so it had been since that terrible day when Darkness had taken a full hold over his friend James...  
  
Snape burst through the class room door in his usual manner, hatred steaming from every fiber of his being. All the fifth year Gryffindor and Slytherin students looked apprehensive, bracing themselves for a double period of potions with the cruel Professor. Snape glared angrily around the classroom. "I expect that all of you have completed the assignment I set for you on 'The curative powers of dried Garshwort'" Snape snarled in his smooth, silky voice, sending shivers down each and everyone of the students spines. He swiftly glided along the rows of desks, collecting each of the student's assignments. Snape then walked silently back to the front of the classroom. "Now, I want you all to take out your text books, 'An In-depth Study of Today's Magical Potions'. By the end of the lesson you shall have written for me a three-page essay about the seven major ingredients for the Windificus potion. Those who fail to complete this task shall have the displeasure of spending some quality time with me during every lunch time for a month". The students all hurriedly pulled out their textbooks and started scanning the pages of the 739-page book for any information that may help them. Snape sat down at his desk to immediately start marking the assignments, he wasn't one to waste time.  
  
'Seamus Finnigan, a rotter of a boy, should have stayed in the muggle world with his father,' Snape thought bitterly. 'Constantly blowing things up!' Snape noted the singe marks on the corners of the pages. Snape continued to read through the assignments, rashly judging them as he glanced over the writing, only half caring as to how good of a job they had done. 'Hermionie Granger...hmmm, yes, that would be right! Perfect, as usual!' He thought with spite as he emitted a small groan of objection. Snape reluctantly scribbled out an 'A' in the corner of one of the leaves of parchment. 'Oh, here is young mister Potter's paper...yes, just as I thought, little Granger has helped him again.' Snape hurried to put the paper on the bottom of the pile, & swiftly jotting down a 'F', one marked deducted for getting Granger to help him, another for being well known for doing absolutely nothing, and the others...the others...well, he didn't really like Potter anyway! 'Ehh, Longbottoms, no need to even read his!' Thought Snape, unfairly giving Neville a D-. 'Hmmm, Bullstrode...' Snape quickly scanned through the paper. 'Yes, fairly satisfactory, B+.' Snape pulled out the next paper, cringing at even the sight of the name: 'Weasly! Suprised he had enough money to buy the roll of parchment, let alone the ink! Generous Potter probably gave it to him,' Snape thought to himself sarcastically. Snape then pushed that paper to the back of the bundle, revealing Draco Malfoys paper. 'Mmm-hmmm, he has obviously put in his very best effort, yes...yes, I think this is very good work indeed, A+.' Although Harry's paper had been better than Malfoys, Snape looked on Malfoy as a younger version of himself, so favored him most highly. Snape continued to mark the assignments, thinking to himself sadistic comments about each of their authors.  
  
Finally the assignments were all marked. And the lesson was close to over. Snape stood from his chair. This movement from him caused the class to look up from their essays. "I shall now come around and hand you each back you paper and collect your...completed essays." With his last phrase all the heads in the class bobbed back down to their papers, and all that could be heard was the sound of quills furiously scribbling on the parchment, besides a quick squeal courtesy of Neville. Snape seemed to float across the floor as he took the students papers and handed them back their assignments. He always hovered over each person a few extra seconds, delighting in watching their face drop as they discovered that all their hard work had scored them a C or less. Snape rounded on Harry, and leaned down over the boy's desk, so that his faces were so close to each other, Harry could smell the foul dead odour being emitted from Snape's mouth, sneering with it's thin lips and stained teeth. "Mister Potter," Snape acutely pronounced. Harry could feel the jets of spittle flying from Snape's mouth (which tended to happen when Snape was angry) and landing in his cheeks and chin. Harry tried not to flinch. "Look at your score", Snape demanded quietly. Harry quickly glanced at his score, not fully understanding where this was going. Then Harry realised that he had...FAILED??? Snape saw Harry's disappointment register in his eyes.  
  
"Why?" Harry asked, trying desperately to keep his voice steady. He knew he deserved better than an F.  
  
"That's what unfairly using a fellow student's help gets you, Potter" Snape snared, sending spit into Harry's face once more.  
  
"Nobody helped me!" Harry answered back, sounding braver than he felt. "This was all my own work.  
  
"...Detention, Potter..." Snape said quietly, feeling a wave of victory come over him.  
  
"WHY?"  
  
"For back answering me, for getting Miss Granger to help you on this assignment, and for lying to me" Snape answered proudly.  
  
Ron glanced at Hermionie, but she only shook her head, she didn't want to get in trouble from Snape too. Ron gave a firm nod, gathered all the courage he could, stood up and said "She didn't help him! He didn't do anything wrong!"  
  
"Looks like we have another volunteer for detention." Snape snarled.  
  
Ron dumped himself back onto his chair, and gave Hermionie an angry stare. Hermionie rebutted it with an I-told-you-so look.  
  
The bell signaling the end of class tolled, and all the students bolted for the door, not wishing to stay in a room with Snape a moment longer than necessary.  
  
Snape was glad that he had the authority to make Harry miserable, and in Ron Weasly volunteered to join the ride, so be it, an added bonus! Now, he had to think of terrible things he could make them do, oh, his mind was scathing with ideas. 'Sort out all the ingredients for potions,' he knew how much they hated having to even look at the pickled dead animals. 'Ah, but there was a flaw with this plan, knowing Potter and Weasly, they would probably steal some of his precious ingredients so as to make some potion, and then everyone would think even MORE highly of Potter,' and that was the last thing Snape wanted! 'Or they could clean all the shelves, floors, and walls of dungeons…the muggle way, but Harry was probably used to that, living with a trio of muggles for the majority of his life'. No, they needed something unusual, something repulsive... 'They could test out some of the potions I have been striving to perfect! Then I will know whether they worked for sure!' Snape thought maliciously.  
  
Snape paced the room impatiently, awaiting the arrival of Mr. Weasley and Mr. Potter. Finally there was a scuffle at the door and some quiet bickering, they had obviously arrived. Snape opened the door to find them both looking extremely guilty. "Done something else wrong already?" Snape questioned quietly. Harry and Ron just looked at each other, then followed Snape in to the cold dungeon, which was only two doors down from Snape's own living space. Snape spun around to face the obnoxious pair. "Now, I have thought of a very special way to spend this little bit of time we shall share in each others' presence. You will understand that I have been creating some potions, you shall help me to see if I have been successful." Snape wrapped his lips curtly around every one of the silky syllables he spoke. Harry and Ron's eyes opened wide, Snape could see that they were overcome with confusion and fear. "Follow me" Snape commanded almost delightedly. All three of the walked through a small arched doorway, in fact, neither Harry nor Ron had noticed it until now. The entered another room full of shelves made from old, rotting wood, most likely held up by magic. Potions in vials of all sizes were sitting on the shelves, some fizzing, some bubbling, some whistling, and others just sitting there looking like any muggle liquid. Snape turned his back on them for a brief second before spinning back around holding two vials, each containing fluorescent green liquid. "Now, drink up, boys, this is very important, surely you can do this simple task without making any mistakes." For the first time in their lives, Harry and Ron saw Snape grin, it wasn't really an improvement, just fully revealing his stained teeth. Snape was watching them intently, waiting for them to pour the liquid down their throats. Snape himself knew that all it would do, if anything at all, was to make their skin turn green, and there was a simple spell to fix discolouration like that. But watching these two boys thinking that he was trying to poison them was a sight that amused Snape highly. Ron closed his eyes, put the vile to his lips…then Harry felt a cold breeze seem to pass through his body, causing him to jump and knock the vial clean out of Ron's hands. Snape fixed Harry with a glare that could kill. He stepped up very close to Harry so as to intimidate him, opened his mouth, quite clearly to yell at Harry, when Snape seemed to stumble backwards. Snape was caught by the wall, which he gratefully leaned against. Snape looked at Harry with suspicion, guessing that Harry must have drawn his wand and cast a spell, but then, Snape felt the coldness beside him, it wasn't Harry… 


	3. Shadows of the Past

1 Secrets in the Dark  
  
1.1 Part three  
  
The coldness, beside him, it sent shivers tingling down his spine. He jumped, drawing a quick, shallow breath. Harry noted the whiteness of Snape's knuckles, and although Snape's hand tightly clasped, they were still evidently shaking. The last time he had felt this presence, it had been completely dark, now it was light, Snape had the chance to see what it really looked like. Snape took a deep breath, turned his head, but instead of turning all the way to look at it, his gaze was caught by the mystified expressions on Harry and Ron's faces. They looked completely bewildered by Snape's actions. He wondered whether the boys could see something he couldn't. This feeling of inferiority persuaded Snape to turn his head abruptly to face the presence. Nothing…nothing but air. He realised that the boys had been watching him, watching his fear reflect in his jerky movements. Quickly struggling to regain control, he straightened up, and, pretending that nothing had happened, he glared at Harry. Snape picked up a potion from the table, and reached out to pass the small vial the Harry. "This time, no excuses!" Snape declared, his voice weaker than usual. Harry, although still afraid of Snape, and still greatly disliking him, felt a strange concern of the Potions Master. Harry was too worried over what had just happened to Snape to remember what could happen when he did not do what Snape asked of him.  
  
"What happened? Are you okay???" Harry asked genuinely.  
  
"Ahh," Snape fumbled over his words. "Nothing, nothing at all. Now drink that potion."  
  
But this answer did not satisfy Harry. "Professor! Please, just tell, me, what happened!?" Harry asked rather bravely, then remembering who he was addressing he added a small "please?"  
  
"Forget it, Potter!" Snape spat.  
  
This time the coldness past through Ron, who let out a scream, which was stifled by his hands over his mouth. Ron, not being one of the bravest wizards you could ever meet, took this as a good time to leave, running out of the room in hysterics. Harry, on the other hand, was too curious to leave.  
  
"Professor, I know something happened, I just want to know what it was…it was that coldness, wasn't it?" Harry looked at Snape for an answer, but he didn't verbally offer one, but judging by the expression on Snape's face, Harry continued. "It passed through me too!"  
  
Snape's head shot up, eyeing Harry curiously. Snape desperately wanted to ask for Harry's advise and opinion of what it was, for it was terrifying him, but he dare not make himself look as if he needed help from a student, and Harry Potter at that! Snape wasn't sure if he wanted Harry to leave or not, so they just stood there, not saying a word, glaring at each other. A few minutes ticked away, without either of them talking or moving, obviously they were both as stubborn as each other. Snape finally relaxed a little, as it seemed that the thing was not going to come back, he drew in a breath to speak, but realised that the air directly in front of his was freezing cold. He stifled a small gasp, and stumbled backwards, hitting his head in a shelf, causing Snape to fall to the ground, unconscious, potion bottles falling around him and smashing on the floor.  
  
  
  
Severus ran as fast as he could back to Peter, Sirius and Remus. "It's happened again!" Severus shouted. All the boys, knowing at once what he was referring to, immediately stood up. "But this time it's worse! He disapperated WITH Lily!" They all knew the severity of this, bringing a complete, unknowing innocent into this. They had to do something! That was a mixed babble of ideas from the boys, none of which would work. The boys spent all afternoon thinking, trying to devise plans, they even found there way to the library, which was not a common place for them to go, but even that didn't help any of them.  
  
That night, the boys were each in their dormitories. Severus could not sleep, he was far to worried, not only about James this time, but about Lily! Then Severus was struck with an idea! He clambered out of the warm bed, his bare feet slapping on the cold, stone ground. Careful not to make a sound, he climbed the stairs up into the Slytherin common room, and out into the deserted corridor. He climbed up many levels of steps, and then made his was up to the top of the tower, which contained the Griffindor common room and dormitories. Having been told the password previously, so he could come and help with James and his dark moods when necessary, he quite easily entered through the fat lady portrait, into the Griffindor common room. Silently he made his was up the stairs to the boys dorm room. He took out his wand and waved it so that the door glided silently open. Severus peered inside, and saw James invisibility cloak hanging off a post of the bed. 'I suppose he uses it so often he has no need to put it away' Severus thought. Using the magic from his wand, Severus guided the invisibility cloak gently into is awaiting palm. Then, once again using the advantage of his wand, he closed the door, and crept away, unnoticed.  
  
It was cold and dark outside, but Severus knew what he had to do. He threw the invisibility cloak over his head, and ran across the grounds and into the dark forest. He was terrified, but determined, he was not going to turn back now! He made his way through the forest, carefully avoiding roots of old trees and fallen branches. Severus walked for what seemed like hours, but still alert and careful. Then, he heard a crack of branches behind him. He hurriedly spun around, to find a welcome surprise - it was a centaur of the forest. Severus removed the cloak so that he was now visible. A centaur looked upon Severus inquisitively, and the asked why he was in the forest, especially at this time of night. Severus simply replied, "I must find Voldermort!" The centaur took a step back, but then replied "you shall not find whom you seek here, if you must find him, you should search further a field, in the shadows of the rock, but I do advise you not to continue your search, you shall not be rewarded, by anyone, not even he himself." The centaur disappeared after that, off into the forest somewhere. Severus thought for a moment 'the shadows of the rock?' Then he realised, the centaur must have been referring to the Shadow Cliffs, yes, that was it. Severus ran through the forest, sharp branches tearing at his bare face and hands, and catching on his clothes. Still he ran further and further, faster and faster until, just as the sun was rising, he reached the edge of the forest. Severus stepped out into the milky dawn, from here he could see the Shadow Cliffs, he would be there by nightfall.  
  
  
  
  
  
Snape awoke, finding himself in the hospital wing, holding a very painful head. He thought hard, but all he could remember was the cold. The, he heard a grunt in the armchair beside the bed. Snape turned to see Albus Dumbledore, face screwed up like an old newspaper, holding a box a Bertie Bott's Every Flavour Beans. "Tripe" he explained absently. "Now, my dear Professor, you have been out for two days now. Young Mr. Potter reported your episode to us."  
  
"He would, wouldn't he" Snape breathed under his breath.  
  
"Now, now, Severus, mustn't be like that, this is a matter of great concern, it was luck Mr. Potter had the presence of mind to run immediately to me, who knows if you would even be here if he did not." Dumbledor stated.  
  
"Yes, I suppose you're right." Snape accepted. Then his curiosity got the better of him, "But Albus, the coldness, do you know what it could be?"  
  
"Ahh, yes. Mr. Potter told us about that, he felt it too. And it sounds to me as if we have a spirit in our midst. Not like our known ghosts, such as Sir Nicholas and The Baron, but rather a presence, trapped outside this plane, yet still aware of our presence. It maybe it is trying to contact us, or annoy us, or just accidentally half connecting with our plane of existence. Whatever reason it may be, it is obviously having effects on you which we do not want. Maybe you should stay here, in the wing, for the time being, so that someone may always be watching out for your safety. It will be best." Dumbledore advised wisely, before standing up and leaving Snape alone.  
  
'I suppose he is right' Snape thought. He hated the fact that he needed help, help from other people, help from…Harry Potter! It was a sort of comforting feeling knowing that there were people who were willing to help him, willing to look out for him. Although, he did hate to feel so dependant on others, they had always let him down in the past, too many times now, so many times in fact, that it was no longer in his nature to trust. Not anyone other than himself, and even that had a question mark beside it now that he could not even control his emotions, an art which he had been practicing for years now. The only person who had never once let him down was Lily, Lily Evans…but, he had let her down, and for that, he still felt responsible and guilty. Snape laid his head down on the pillow, and thought of this, and once again, emotions overtook his mind.  
  
  
  
  
  
The Shadow Cliffs were drawing nearer, Severus could now hear a low, rhythmic chanting, a sure sign that he was drawing nearer to his desired destination. He strained his eyes and could just make out tiny, shadowy figures slowly moving in front of the cliff. The shadows were growing longer, as the sun sank behind the horizon, to his left. As he drew nearer, Severus could see that the people were entranced in a slow, circular pace, around a large, flat, grey stone, on which, was the struggling body of a girl. A small stone crunched under Severus's foot, drawing the attention of each of the dark, hooded people. The one that was evidently the leader waved his arm, and immediately two figures glided swiftly over, grabbing Severus's arms and fastening them behind his back. Severus knew that struggling would not help, and these people were in fact dragging him directly to the place which he had been trying to reach for over a day now, so was quite relaxed, letting them do all the work of holding him upright. He was unprepared for the harsh way his body fell to the hard, uneven ground. Severus picked himself up to address the leader, whose feet he had been dropped at, although, his eyesight shifted past the figure, to the girl fastened to the stone, and fell back to the ground. It was Lily! Severus gathered himself, and again stood, more composed than last time, and announced "I am here as an exchange!" Severus paused, but then there was silence, so he continued. "Myself, for the girl" he said pointing at Lily. One of the figures stepped forward, and removed its hood. James! His face was reluctant, as he placed his hand on Lily's face, and traced her jaw line with his finger, which obviously repulsed the girl.  
  
"I am afraid," the leader spoke with a slippery hiss, "that this man has just claimed this specimen for his wife."  
  
Severus thought, then said "There is much which I can do for you, I can help you, I excel in classes, especially potion making, where this girl can only form a means of entertainment for you, no real use for your cause, please, take me instead!"  
  
The leader appeared to be thinking, then, without uttering a word, waved his wand and Lily was released from the stone. Severus, although relieved, was terrified, now for his own safety. James uttered a groan of protest, but was waved into quiet by the leader. Lily stood up, and began to run over to Severus, but she tripped and landed flat on her face. Severus quickly swept over to her and checked that she was all right. Her clothes were a little torn and here face was badly bruised, but nothing unrepairable. Lily opened her eyes, she knew what he had just dine for her. She began to weep, surprised and touched that she could mean so much to someone, yet, distressed and terrified about all that he had just given up for her.  
  
"You no longer belong here, LEAVE!" The leader thundered. Before Lily would have given anything to leave, but, now, knowing that Severus was going to be left here with them, she wanted to stay, to protect and comfort him. Then the leader started chanting such a verse that Severus's hair stood on end & a chill ran down his spine. Lily started to cry harder, and cry out, as if this chanting physically hurt her. She jumped up and ran as swiftly as she could towards the Dark Forest, only looking back once, at Severus.  
  
Then James spoke, "Now that she is gone, what shall we do with 'him', Voldermort?"  
  
The leader turned towards Severus, and removed his hood, with a malicious glint in his eyes… 


	4. Memories of the Dark Mark

A/N: Sorry it took me so long to write this chapter, moving house takes up a lot of time, god bless the holidays! I have some reviews, 8 I think at the moment, but please, would you mind reviewing each chapter as I go? I want to know what you all think, if you have any good ideas for the story line, if you pick up mistakes, if you liked it or even if you hated it. I would like to thank those of you who have reviewed it (Rach, Sarah, Lara, Jess), it is people like you who help me to continue writing.  
  
Disclaimer: None of these characters are mine (as usual) they all belong to JK Rowling, only the story line is my own.  
  
  
  
Snape re-awoke in the warm bed in the hospital wing. He sat up abruptly hoping that with movement & awareness of reality, the visions & memories with had plagued his sleep through the night would fade. They didn't. They were swirling in his consciousness and forcing him to remember. He heard a bustle & saw Madam Pomfrey walk in carrying a large tray of food.  
  
"Ah, you're awake, good, good! I brought your breakfast for you," she announced as she handed the tray to the Professor. "It should help you to get your strength back. From what I've heard, you've been through a lot lately, com'on, eat up."  
  
Snape eyed the meal suspiciously. It looked okay he supposed. Warm toast with some kind of golden spread, a mug of hot chocolate & two chocolate frogs. This made even Snape grin. Madam Pomfrey, seeing the approval on Snape's face, cheerfully hurried away to attend to some other patients.  
  
When Snape had finished his breakfast Dumbledore arrived for a visit & a chat.  
  
"How are you my boy?" Dumbledore asked in a fatherly manner.  
  
Snape didn't know if he liked being talked to in such a way, but on the other hand, it did make him feel secure, so he merely replied "As well as can be expected."  
  
Dumbledore prompted Snape to eat his chocolate frogs, to which, Snape happily complied.  
  
"I've been thinking, Severus, this presence…it seems to come only to you." Dumbledore concluded.  
  
"No, don't forget young Potter, he felt it too" Snape reminded defensively.  
  
"Ah, yes, but, it was only when he was with you, he hasn't sensed it at any other time, and, it didn't torment him it the way it did to you" Dumbledore clarified.  
  
Snape realised he was right, the presence seemed only to be interested in him! But why? He couldn't figure it out. Obviously, it had some connection to his past, as it seemed that every time he had any contact with it, he would fall into a trance-like state and remember so much that he had chosen to forget. Maybe it was Voldermort? Maybe it was James?! Snape went ghostly pale at this thought, so Dumbledore suggested that Snape go out for a walk to get some fresh air. Give himself some time so sift through his thoughts in solitude.  
  
Snape went and changed into his robes. Madam Pomfrey had agreed that a little fresh air would do him good. Snape was ready & walked swiftly outside, into the grounds, his black cloak swishing as it was forced to keep up with his fast pace. Snape walked through the gardens, past the green houses, and past the Whomping Willow, down to the lake. He sat down on the grass and listened to the birds singing and the water lapping gently on the dark rocks, which were a great contrast to the pale blue of the lake. The sun caught a ripple on the water, causing the glaring light to flicker onto Snape's pensive face. He quickly glanced up to find the source of the flash, looking to the rippling lake. He stood and walked over to it, so as to see what beautiful creatures where swimming in it this day. Snape bent over the tranquil lake & was caught off guard by his reflection & stumbled back. 'Stupid, so absolutely Stupid!' He cursed his own lack of realisation. He steadied himself on his feet and looked back in the water, this time expecting to see his own reflection. He did. He was appalled be his own ugliness, it disgusted even himself. His hooked nose looking excessively large for his thin face. His sallow skin traced the sharp outline off his easily definable bones. His eyes were dark, and Snape could recognise some of the same emptiness he had seen in James' eyes when he was working for Voldermort. This actually made him sad, to know how awful he seemed. Although, he knew why he looked that way, it was from his time spent serving Voldermort, it had drained him, his soul was now only half of what it had been, and it hurt him to know this. His reflection became easier to look at as he held its gaze. Maybe it was just that he hadn't really looked at it properly for so long and he was just getting use to it. But…no, his reflection was changing, growing younger & healthier looking. Snape was confused and amazed, what was it doing? What was causing this reaction? Then he saw Lily's reflection in the water beside him, young, beautiful, alive…He watched as they both faded and as another scene appeared…  
  
  
  
Severus could now only feel complete hate radiating from James, there was no longer any of his friend left, it was entirely overtaken by Voldermort. Severus looked up at the leader, wearing no hood, revealing the face of Voldermort, who was glaring down at him. "You say you are good at potions, eh? Well, you'd better start being useful right now! What ingredients would I need to make a potion strong enough to kill a person and banish their spirit?"  
  
Severus didn't like the sound of that at all so he contemplated lying to Voldermort.  
  
"I wouldn't do that if I were you!" warned Voldermort, as if reading Severus's mind.  
  
"I'm not exactly sure what would be necessary, I do not believe such a potion exist as yet, so I would need time to collect many different ingredient and experiment" Severus replied matter-of-factly.  
  
"Alright…go, find your ingredients. I want this potion soon!" Snape turned to walk away when Voldermort thundered "WAIT! I know how people like you think, come back here."  
  
Voldermort then beckoned one of the hooded figures, who complied instantly.  
  
"Inscribe my mark on his left wrist, so if he does run," Voldermort continued, more for Severus's benefit than anyone elses. "No one will trust him, and so I may find him where ever he is."  
  
The hooded figure walked over to Severus & grabbed his wrist. His skin was cold & scaly. The figure revealed his hand, one fingernail reaching far longer than the others did & forming a sharp gray point at the end. The figure placed his fingernail on Severus's wrist, and began to scratch out the Dark Mark. Severus's face twisted in pain, his reflexes told him to pull his hand away, but, although he tried, the grip the figure had on his wrist was far too strong. Finally his hand was released. Severus stared at his wrist, comprehending what had just been drawn. His wrist was bleeding, but now the blood was gray. Severus could feel the change already, he knew he had to stay. The Dark Mark tied him to these people….  
  
  
  
A movement in the water caused Snape's mind to come charging back to the present. Still staring at his reflection, he still looked young. Snape blinked and his reflection had changed again, back to being old and worn down. Snape sat back down on the grass, his mind running over the newly released memories. They were hard for him to deal with, that was why he had suppressed them to begin with. He wasn't as strong as people thought he was, his only strength was his weakness. He had to act the way he did, cruel and sadistic, to protect if weak and broken self. Snape held his wrist out in front of himself, so he could observe the Dark Mark that still resided on his wrist. He couldn't stop himself, he started to violently cry, hugging his knees close to his chest, rocking gently forwards and backwards to comfort himself. Then he felt it…the coldness…it was around his shoulders. This coldness frightened him, his fear powered his tears, and he sat there and continued crying, letting out so much emotion that he had suppressed these past years. The coldness moved gently up and down his back, as a friend would, for comfort. Snape's tears finally subsided, and he was aware of the coldness still there…next to him. Snape was prepared not to see anything as he turned to face the presence, but this time, there was more than just mere air… 


	5. The Form takes a Face

A/N: Thank you to all who have reviewed, I am so sorry this chapter has taken so long to put up, I didn't feel it was good enough so had to re- write it a couple of times. Thank you DuckSorceress (your fic is coming along brilliantly). Rachel (you always encourage me in this, no matter how slow I am at it or how lousy it may seem). Lastly thanks to Helena, & also to Starlight (I am a little embarrassed that such a wonderful writer read this amateur piece of work, thank you).  
  
I realised that my Snape was getting a little bit sloppy, so this chapter is focusing on bringing back his hate.  
  
And for those of you who prefer romances, just to let you know, this story is a romance/supernatural, I just have to get through this so I can ad the romance element, so it is on its way.  
  
Disclaimer: The usual "I don't own Harry Potter" speech which every one knows off by heart.  
  
1 Secrets in the Dark  
  
1.1 Part 5  
  
Instead of the nothingness, which Snape expected to see, he could make out a face. It was transparent & barely visible, but none the less, it was quite obviously there. Snape stood abruptly, staring at the figure infront of him. It was….LILY!?!?! Snape stumbled back, almost loosing his balance. Here he was, now confronted with the thing he feared most in his life. Lily was becoming more definably, although she was still quite transparent & ghostly. Her eyes locked with his, they had no colour in them, & made Snape feel very cold. Snape heard a clap of thunder & he looked around to see clouds rapidly rolling in, dark, threatening clouds, which blocked out the sun. Wind began whipping around Snape's face & body, & soon it was so dark, that the only light was that given off by the lightning. It was dark, he could no longer see Lily's form, straining his eyes where she had been. Then the was a flash of lightning & Lily was illuminated in the light, suddenly appearing much closer than where Snape had been trying to focus on her. Her eyes were cold, showing the pain she was in, her brows drawn into a frown, her hands reaching in front of her…for him! The lightning faded and Lily disappeared, he saw her suddenly disappear, but stayed focused where she had been. Then lightning flashed, & Lily's face, out of focus because she was so close, along with the deafening crack of thunder, caused Snape's heart to almost stop. He no longer had control of his senses, all that he had left was instinct, the instinct of survival. He turned, without really realising it & ran, didn't know where, just ran. In his panic he was paying no attention to his footing, only escaping from her. He tripped & landed face down in the grass. He quickly scrambled to his feet, with the mind to continue running, but his stomach dropped, as he realised it was not windy, of stormy, in fact, it was a beautiful day, with no sign of what he had just been through. He slowly turned to look back where he had been, where SHE had been, just proving to himself that none of it really had happened. And there she was, still transparent, standing next to a small tree, looking straight through him. Snape closed his eyes for one moment, trying to sort out in his mind what to do, he opened his eyes, still looking in her direction, but she wasn't there.  
  
  
  
Snape had reached the castle again, safety lay in those dimly lit corridors, in those cold rooms. He made his way back up to the hospital wing, wishing he could just stay away from there, stop showing his dependency on other people, & just have time to think about what he was going through. Snape paused out side the door, composing himself. He burst in, throwing the door open in front of him, & began pacing beside his bed, a scowl finding its way onto his face. Madam Pomfrey bustled in again, after hearing him re-enter the infirmary. All he could do was sneer at her, not wishing for her cheery demeanor to be forced upon him once more.  
  
"Ah, Severus, I see that fresh air has done you good, you seem to be back to your old self again" she pointed out, her humor evident in her voice.  
  
Snape glared at the woman, angered by her impertinence, but refrained from saying anything.  
  
"How are you feeling? If you are feeling ok, well, then I would say you would be free to leave." She smiled at him as his scowl was replaced by a slightly more pleasant expression.  
  
He bowed his head slightly in reply, before swiftly turning & sweeping back out of the room. Anything to get out of that room. That room was for people too incompetent or helpless to look after themselves, & he certainly didn't consider himself to be like that, despite what his present situation may suggest.  
  
'At least now I can go back to teaching, stop those damned dunderheads having time for themselves during MY Potions class!!! Not that teaching them is any pleasure, or even worth my while' Snape thought bitterly to himself.  
  
  
  
The bell to signal the beginning of the lesson tolled out across the school, students bustled to their classes, nodding in greeting to their friends as they passed each other. Snape walked down the corridor, in the opposite direction to the main flow of the students, heading to the library where his class had been told to go until he had recovered. One small first year girl bumped into him, she obviously suffered more from this than he did as her slight whimper of pain showed, but her simply glared at her, causing her to mutter a barely audible "Sorry" as she scampered away from him. He merely sneered after her & continued walking to the library.  
  
Professor Snape reached the library and entered, his foul mood even more apparent than before at spotting his students smiling & quietly chatting to each other. He nodded courteously to Madam Pince, who looked over her spectacles & gave a half smile before looking back down to her book.  
  
'I see that her judgement on good books has yet to improve' Snape thought bitterly to himself, noting the title – "Weathering Heights". Madam Pince had already read all the books in the library, & was now on to muggle books, something that Snape frowned upon. Snape silently glided over to one group from his class, silently taking up a position behind them. He stood there, quietly listening to their conversation, waiting for the right time to make his presence known.  
  
"I can't even imagine why Dumbledore employs that old slimy git, he is so boring, it's not like we're ever going to learn anything with him" stated one golden haired boy.  
  
"I know, & he actually thinks he is a good teacher! It's hilarious, we learn more with Treawnley!" voiced the girl beside him.  
  
"If I were Dumbledore I would have the Snape chained up in Azkaban!" another girl of the group said.  
  
"Yes, my dad told me about how he was a follower of You-Know-Who & all these awful things he did to people! It was awful! He would steal little children & eat them for breakfast! He would put old witches on chains & make them be his slaves! & my dad told me that he would cut up wizards in to lots of little pieces just to hear them scream!…."  
  
"Is that right, Mr Goldstien?" Snape interrupted, deciding that he had heard enough lies. "What else did your father tell you I did? I would be very interested to discuss it after school today in detention."  
  
Mark Goldstien shifted in his seat uncomfortably, trying to think of an excuse but found his mind blank.  
  
"Okay, all of you, back to class," not one of the students moved from their positions, all waiting for each other to move first. "Or would you all like to join you Mr Goldstien in detention with me?"  
  
With Snape's threat, all the students hurriedly bustled out of the library. Snape turned to see Mme Pince watching over her book, watching Snape in a very condescending manor. Snape just scowled at her, but didn't say anything, the staff already knew that he held no respect for her, or her for him, he didn't need the students knowing too.  
  
Back in the class room Professor Snape put the student to work immediately. Not only did this keep them quiet, but it also gave him some time to think. He didn't understand about the Lily, or why her spirit was cold & haunting him, but he knew he had to find out. He hated to admit it but he knew that the answer lay in his past, & to figure out the whole situation, he would have to face his memories, have to chose to relive it all in his mind. This was something that he had been avoiding for many years now, & he wasn't looking forward to it…  
  
  
  
The students of his last class of the day had left, his classroom was once again desolate. Snape locked his classroom door & warded it, then he swiftly glided toward his dungeons. He entered & went straight to the bookshelf & searched through all the books that had been placed there. Annoyed that there was no book there to help his cause Snape then went to his bed & crouched down so that he could reach under it. He pulled out an old wooden trunk with brass handles slowly lifted the lid. The hinges creaked & moaned, as they had not been used in so many long years. Snape reached in & gently lifted out a small, leather bound book with the letters 'S.S.' burnt in the top right hand corner. This had been where Snape had written all his notes when he had been under the rule of Voldermeort, surely there would be some clues there. He continued searching through the trunk, pulling out James' old letters that they had written to each other when they were still young & he placed them with the old notebook. Digging deeper in the trunk Snape found some other things. Useless old Robes which had been passed down through his family, which he personally didn't care for, his key for Gingotts, & an old damaged photograph of his mother & father with him, which he paused to look at for a brief moment before violently shoving it aside. Then, the last thing in his trunk was a thick black book with the words "The Ancestry of Darkness" inscribed on the cover in emerald green letters.  
  
'This could be of some use' thought Snape of the old, dusty book, which he had never even bothered to look through before. Snape carried the books over to his desk & placed himself on the spindly chair.  
  
'Here comes the difficult part' Snape thought as he carefully opened the cover of the smaller book… 


	6. Potion of Banishment

Disclaimer: the usual.  
  
1 Secrets in the Dark  
  
1.1 -Part 6  
  
Snape forced his eyes open, realising that he had fallen asleep. He abruptly pulled his head up for where it had been resting, a piece of parchment sticking to his face momentarily before floating back to his desk. Snape remembered what he had been doing the night before & couldn't help but wonder what time it had been when he had fallen asleep. He looked down at the parchment, which was now resting over the books, looking a little crumpled from where he had been lying on it. Snape turned it over so that he could read over the notes he had taken last night & refresh his memory.  
  
'A bani------~~'  
  
'Well then,' Severus thought, observing the lazy scribble of ink on his page. 'I did fall asleep rather quickly then.' He inwardly chuckled, keeping his outward expression impassive. Snape flipped to the first page of his journal. This is what it read:  
  
  
  
'I am a Death Eater. I do not know what my future now holds & I am not looking forward to finding out. I cannot leave these people, by the mark on my arm of the skull & the snake, The Dark Mark, I know I am now one of them. I wish I weren't here, yet I prefer myself being here than it being Lily, I do hope she made it back to Hogwarts all right.  
  
Voldermort now wishes me to make a potion to kill a person & banish their spirit, the killing part is simple, but to banish the spirit? That is proving the difficult part. I can't help but wonder who this potion is planed for, I can only thank Merlin it isn't me, that I know of.  
  
James is acting strangely, usually keeping the same black expression, his eyes though burn with anger & hate which I can't help but feel is directed at me. A couple of times though I have looked at James to see his eyes without the harsh bitterness to them, but instead looking extremely pained & scared, I don't know what has happened to him, but I do not believe he is like this of his own free will.  
  
Tomorrow I have been told I must kill an innocent to prove my dedication to Voldermort, I do not wish to do such a thing, but if I don't then I shall be killed myself, and if I am killed, I feel sure they shall go back after Lily. I hope she is safe.'  
  
  
  
Snape lifted his head from his journal. He couldn't help but be angry at how cowardly he had been, how easily ordered about, how foolish, & fools were not something Snape had time for, the thought that he had once been one just added to his self-hate even more, he had hated himself for a long time now…  
  
  
  
'I have figured out what ingredients I shall need to banish a spirit, but according to my calculations, any of the common killing potions would counter act with the banishing agents & lessen both of the effects, creating a simple liquid which would give a high followed by a short period of unconsciousness. The person would have to be murdered with a spell rather than the potion, creating more work, but it should still work, none the less. Now what I must do is find and collect the necessary ingredients.  
  
I felt it today, I fell the evil creep in my soul, it did not last long, but I no longer possessed my own mind, it was automatic, & the thoughts were cruel & not my own, the thought of death & torture gave me a sense of pleasure. I did not even realise I was thinking in such away until I was sent away to do more research of the potion on my own, by leaving the group, I was also leaving the evil. I know this is not who I am, but I can't control it. I wonder if all the Death Eaters were controlled by this, or whether it was their own free will, & they really were cruel & sadistic demons. '  
  
  
  
Snape remembered that day, it was the first day he had felt such evil, part of which he still kept with him to this day, partly for protection, partly from his anger. But it was no such evil as was what he had experienced then.  
  
Thinking about what he had written of the potion he knew that what he needed was to find what ingredients he had actually used, for this he pushed his journal away from him & instead pulled up the large black book, "Ancestry of Darkness". This book contained information on every dark witch & wizard who had ever done anything even mildly noteworthy, plus almost every curse, dark potion, or idea ever to be created. His father had given him this book when he was only 8, Snape knew his father was not a good man. Snape had lived with just his mother since he was 3, his mother having left her father once he turned to the dark side, not wishing herself or her only son to be involved in such wickedness. Yet Snape's father had slyly met with his son, presenting him with gifts & teaching him curses to try & turn him against his mother. Although Snape loved his mother & never had turned away from her, he had enjoyed receiving the praise & gifts from his father, who, in most aspects of his life may as well not have existed, so he had kept the gifts, which included this book.  
  
Snape remembered his father saying to him once "Son, if you ever make a new potion or curse which you believe is worthy of being in this book, go a head & write it in there, also any evil witches or wizards who you think deserve a place in this book. When you are old, pass it to your son."  
  
Although Snape hadn't liked the idea of a 'book of evil', when he had invented to potion he had written it in there in some sub-conscious attempt to do his father proud.  
  
Snape flipped through the pages, slowing as he reached the last few pages of the heavy book. There it was, on the second last page, ebony ink slightly smudged, but still legible:  
  
  
  
'Banishment  
  
Potion for banishing a spirit onto a lower plane of existence. The soul shall reside there forever unless a counter-potion is used.  
  
Ingredients:  
  
1 teaspoon of Powdered Root of Asphodel with an infusion of Wormwood (to create the uselessness of a body & the same unconscious but living state as in "The Draught of Living Death" potion).  
  
2 small Refoburnly Mushrooms (can be found in the Dark forest, these are used to separate someone's spirit from their body).  
  
Petals of a black rose (The petals of such dark a colour will ensure the spirit is sent to a dark place).  
  
5 mL Juice of Tightlock Vine (this vine is one of great strength & is often used to help old trees to stay standing, we here are using this plants power to keep a thing where it is, for even it's juice it powerful on souls).  
  
Method:  
  
Add these ingredients together in a small cauldron. Stir together while heating. Substance should turn brown & become crumbly. At this point, put the newly formed substance & place it in a chalice of warm water. Stir till dissolved. Potion is not ready to be consumed.'  
  
  
  
Now Snape had the original potion, he knew what he had to do…  
  
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A/N: Sorry that this chapter took so long to put up, I hope it wasn't too boring, but I really need to get some of this out of the way so I can get on with the rest of the story.  
  
Thank you to those who have reviewed:  
  
1. Helen(I am so very flattered that you want to know when I update, you are the first person to ask me to let you know :D).  
  
2. Rach (thanks for your constant support, & you have a lovely story going).  
  
3. Starlight (can't wait till you post your next chapter).  
  
4. Ducky (saw that you started your second fic, very good!)  
  
5. Elli (thank for taking that extra time to review, when are you starting your next story?)  
  
6. Fluere(I read your story too, I really enjoyed it)  
  
7. Cat (I'm glad you like the my twist o James, your review was lovely)  
  
8. & Kasey, (thanks for your correction on Lily's appearance, I have fixed that now)  
  
Your reviews mean a lot to me!  
  
1.1.1 Thank you to all who read this story so far * blows kisses to everyone * :D 


	7. Magic of the Miend

A/N: I am fully aware I have been far too long in posting another chapter, and can't express how sorry I am. I must also admit though, there may not be another for a wile either, I have such a busy schedule at the moment, I really should be attempting my homework or doing my piano practice at the moment, but I just received all these ideas for this story and just felt very compelled to write more. Thank you for those of you who are putting up with my tardiness.  
  
Disclaimer: Marshmellows hit me on the head while I eat hentalated miend (you'll understand later).  
  
  
  
Secrets In The Dark  
  
-Part 7  
  
The day was bright, the sun cast a warm glow over the pebbled path, the weather didn't match Snape's mood at all. He dreaded having to find the ingredients need for a counter curse, just the thought of his past made him sick to his stomach, and now that was all he could focus on! What made it worse was the knowledge that all that had happened in his past was his own fault. He was an idiot for letting himself become so worthless, he wasn't to hit himself.hard.as hard as he could stand it.harder than that even. Professor Magonagal strolled past, kindly presenting Snape with an acknowledging smile which he did not return. He had no time for such pleasantries today; he had a very serious difficulty to sort out! He had to find a yellow rose, which wouldn't be too much trouble, seeing as Hogwart's grounds were flooded with gardens, containing every type of flower imaginable. He needed the /yellow/ rose specifically so he colour bring he back to the physical plane of existence, red would just send her to the emotional plane and white would only serve to send her to the plane of purity. Snape collected the rose with now trouble, but now he had to discover what else he would need. Thinking back over the other ingredients used in his original potion, - asphodel, wormwood, refoburnly mushrooms, and juice of tightlock vine - he had to think of what counteracted each of them. To counteract 'The draught of Living Death' a very powerful and rare ingredient was needed: hentalated miend, which was a very rare crystal which has been aging for millions of years, too much intake could be fatal, but that wasn't the only problem - it would be very expensive! But Snape knew he had to retrieve such a rarity.for her sake.  
  
  
  
Snape stared hypnotically out the window as the Hogwarts express rocked and bumped quietly on its way to Hogsmeade station. Snape, although knowing rare animals were his specialty, conceded to ask Hagrid of any sealers who would possibly hold in their possession any hentalated miend. He had received a few suggestions from the giant, but nothing was assured, so Snape had received a month's break from Albus to pursue what it was he had to. The train finally grinded to a whining standstill. Snape rapped his long, black cloak around him, and, picking up his large black case, alighted from the smoking train. He looked about, trying to decide which mindless old snipe he was to pay his first call on. He was thirsty from his journey and rather weary.  
  
'How much good would a cool glass of butterbeer do me now!' Snape thought longingly to himself, but never considered the idea as a serious option - he was not one to waste time indulging himself. Instead Snape contented himself by apparating to Mr. Cerritus's* abode. Snape observed the untamed ground and crumbling, clay building with disgust. He grudgingly knocked three times on the small door which was evidently rotting away. After a couple of moments the door creaked slightly open to reveal one large, grey eye.  
  
"Good morning, I am Professor Severus Snape from Hogwarts School of Witchcraft and Wizardry. I have been advised that you may be able to help me." Snape informed the eye curtly but the eye merely stared back blandly, not even blinking. "I am in need of hentalated miend".  
  
The door swung open wide to reveal a short little wizard, dressed in an inside-out robe and who possessed only a sparing amount of silver hair. He hobbled away, quickly for his apparent age, and took a seat on a chair. Snape, after ducking through the tiny door into the dirt floored, single roomed house, followed the man to where he had settled himself. As Snape waited, Mr. Cerritus began mumbling to himself.  
  
"What she saw in him.elbows, elbows.I need to buy more mildew for.pah! Kids...the kettle's boiling.he banished my baby.it's a secret."  
  
"Excuse me Mr Cerritus" Snape interrupted. "Do you have any hentalated meind?!" The old man's face short up to glare into Snape's inquisitive but reserved eyes. "Who told you about her?"  
  
"Her?"  
  
The old man stood and bustled across to an old, pewter box in the corner. He opened it to reveal a gleaming hunk of hentalated miend. Snape's eyes lit up at the sight but the rest of his face remained impassive. As he approached the box, the old man picked it up and held it protectively against his chest.  
  
"He said never to let you lay hands on it!" Mr Cerritus snapped.  
  
"Me? Who told you this?" Snape inquired. The old man made no attempt to explain but instead started pulling faces at Snape. This wasn't worth it, there was no way the old git would change his mind, he was obviously senile. Snape walked to the door, and looked back once to make sure the old man hadn't changed his mind. But no, Mr Cerritus was sitting on the ground with his mouth around the chunk of hentalated miend. 'Ahh, that explains a lot' he thought before exiting the hut and apparating to his next port of call.  
  
After ringing to small brass bell which hung beside the elegant wooden door, a tall man dressed in a tuxedo appeared and waited for Snape's command.  
  
"I am Professor Severus Snape from Hogwarts School of Witchcraft and Wizardry, I am here to speak with Mr. Zaplutus*."  
  
The butler bowed and walked away. Not caring for such a display, Snape impatiently followed up the flights of stairs to where Mr Zaplutus was seated in his lounge room. Mr Zaplutus was a short man himself, and rather solid too, making him appear sturdy.  
  
"Good morning! Take a seat Mr.?" Zaplutus inquired pleasantly, showing his warm smile.  
  
"/Professor/ Snape" he correctled coldly, not caring at all for the over enthused personality of this man, no wonder Hagrid knew him.  
  
"Oh, I am dreadfully sorry. I am Mr Zaplutus."  
  
"I am fully aware of that, sir" Snape responded harshly.  
  
"Oh, ok. How may I help you this fine day?"  
  
"Call it what you will," Snape replied, referring to the quality of the day Zaplutus had stated. "I come in search of hentalated meind." Mr Zaplutus's eyes widened, and he quickly stood and began closing all the doors to the spacious room.  
  
"What would you want a thing like that for?!?!"  
  
"I do not believe that is any of your business."  
  
"But, but, heptanated miend is a very dangerous substance! It has no use except for one! You couldn't possibly have any use for it! That one is very destructive!!! No sir, you must be mistaken!" Zaplutus warned.  
  
"I believe I'll decide what what it is I need"  
  
"But, please sir, hear me out here! Hentalated miend has no effect on anything unless it is consumed! And all it does then it does then is cause all the natural operations in the body to work faster, throwing the being in to overload! This causes excruciating pain for the victim and causes them to go senile from their lack of ability to cope with what they are going through!!!" Zaplutus stressed.  
  
"I am fully aware of that." Snape spat, emphasising every syllable and pronouncing every consonant so it sliced the air like a knife.  
  
"In that case, I am afraid I cannot help you sir, Jones shall show you the door". At Zaplutus's command, the butler entered the room and once again bowed.  
  
Not wishing to show his desperation, Snape accepted Zaplutus's decision and left the house without another word.  
  
There was only one hope left for Snape, one place left to look. But it was a place which Snape had visited in the past and did not wish to go there again.  
  
~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~ I did my homework for this chapter, I thought you all deserve a little extra effort from me -  
  
1. Zaplutus Latin for "rolling in money".  
  
Cerritus Latin for "insane". 


	8. The Glass of Knockturn Alley

A.N.: thank you to all who reviewed my last chapter, and I am very honored by you reading this now too Ash. Sorry it has taken so long for this chapter, it got stuck when my computer caught a virus and then I posted it & remembered another paragraph I needed to put on. But hopefully, with the holidays now, a few more chapters shall magically appear. Thanx for sticking with me.  
  
Disclaimer: usual  
  
Secrets in the Dark  
  
- Part 8  
  
  
  
Snape calmly strode up the flagstone street of Diagon Alley. His robes were filmy pulled around his body so that the little brats who were enthusiastically running around didn't some how contaminate him, they always seemed to have something sticky or dirty on their little grubby hands and face, how anyone could stand young children he'd never know, having to teach those small minded students was bad enough. As he expeditiously made his way through the shadows and past cramped stores, Snape thought he felt someone watching him. He glanced around in all directions, thoroughly studying all the faces he could see for someone facing his direction, but, finding no one to match his criteria, he continued of his way. A chill ran down Snape's spine as he realised he no longer needed to stay close to the buildings and shops to be shrouded by shadow, he had entered Knockturn Ally and he recognized most of the shops here, being where he had been sent to obtain rare an dark equipment for the Dark Lord. This cold, damp place was oozing with sin, and it made Snape feel apprehensive. He sneered hatefully at two old witched who were selling old skulls and glaring suspiciously at him. He wanted to get away from this place as quickly as possibly, and he could have sworn there was someone following him, but every time he spun around viciously to check, al he could see were the rickety shop façades and a couple of ragged looking sales people standing behind there stores on the stone lane. Snape discerned the particular shop he needed to seek assistance from squashed between the 'Shoppe of Grind' where you could buy anything which was ground, fro ground pepper to ground bones and more, and an old shop which sold rare and harmful potions, most of which had actually been banned from use in any respectable area. Snape slowly and cautiously pushed open the dusty glass door which was now rather discoloured. Behind the wooden counter was a dark hall, which, when Snape looked closely, he could distinguish a pair of eyes staring out blankly, not seeming at al to look like a pair. Standing in front of the counter defiantly, looking almost as if he belonged, Snape ran a long, dresden finger along the bench before tracing it up to the top of a small brass bell and tapping it so that the ringing resounded through out the small room. The two eyes moved forward and emerged from the darkness. Snape found himself standing face to face with an elderly man who possessed one glass eye, and Snape realised that this man was no stranger to him.  
  
"My my my, well if it isn't Vitrum* Oculus*, I weren't aware you were still alive" Snape announced, trying to sound as sincere as was possible for a Snape.  
  
"And who may you be to know my name, sir" Vitrum replied with the same forced civility.  
  
"Who I am is of no concern to you at present," came Snape's icy reply. "I am here to inquire whether you have possession on any hentilated meind?"  
  
"Hentilated meind hey? Yeah, we, have a bit, but it'll cost you".  
  
"Name your price Oculus" Snape commanded coolly.  
  
"300 galleons!"  
  
"Done"  
  
Vitrum glared suspiciously at the tall, dark robed man standing before him before bustling off back into the dark room. He returned some minutes later with a block of hentilated miend the size of his fist.  
  
"Here you are sir, now, I must ask you to pay in cash of course" Vitrum instructed, intending to flaw the ark, greasy haired stranger as he handed over the miend.  
  
Snape's slender hand extended from his pocket to not only reveal the hearty sum of 300 Galleons, but also the Dark Mark.  
  
This observation caused Vitrum to realise to whom he was speaking. "Severus. I never thought I would be seeing you again," cam the cold and nasty voice. "I would have thought The Dark Lord would have disposed of you by now, you traitor! Look at you; look at what you've become! Nothing! You could have stayed with us, my friend, we could have ruled, we could have had power beyond our dreams!"  
  
"Vitrum," interupted the quiet, but deadly hiss of the Professor's silky voice. "Look at yourself, you never had power! You were ruled by some one else! You have no idea how pathetic you really are, you are worse than a sniveling child, always hiding behind your master's cloak, well he's not here anymore, and now you are nothing. I would rather spend time with Potter than with you!"  
  
"SANGUIS*!!!" Vitrum called as Snape tried to evade the magical blow which was emitted for Vitrum Oculus's wand before stumbling out the door, hentilated meind firmly grasped in his hand.  
  
After Snape had exited the small shop in a fluster he hastily apparated back to Hogsmeade station. As he glace coldly around at a stumpy witch, he noticed that her gaze was fixed on him, and her facial expression was quite astounding! Her mouth was slightly ajar and there was a slight frown between her gray eyes, which were so wide they looked as though they might pop out at any moment. Snape glared at her for a moment before deciding to discover what it was that had the woman so horrifically captivated. What Snape saw next he wasn't prepared for. His robes were dripping and around him on the platform was a shallow pool of blood. Snape's hands shot up so he cold see what state his skin was in, and they appeared to be in exactly the same state as the rest of his body must have - the skin was not visible for all the blood, which was pulsing out through his pores, collecting on his fingertips before dropping to the ground. So, Vitrum's spell had not missed as presumed, but Snape did not worry, he had encountered such a spell before and knew that his fear would only cause his heart to pump faster, therefore causing his blood to flow out at a quicker rate. Snape calmly reached for his wand within his robe's sleeve - which he found after pushing his hand through the blood which was caught up there.  
  
"Macula*" Snape hissed to his wand.  
  
Instantly the blood ceased to flow from his body, but although he no longer risked bleeding to death, he was still soaked from his own blood and he felt light-headed. Snape gave a sharp nod towards the elderly woman to assure her not to be alarmed before turning to walk in the direction of the castle. He stumbled slightly, but remained his balance on the first couple of steps, but his perception was so foggy that a slight dip in the ground caused him to lose his balance and fall to the ground in a cursing heap.  
  
"Now, now, no need for all that Severus"  
  
Snape raised his eyes to see a blurred Dumbledore standing a few paces away. Snape grunted as if he believed Dumbledore had no right to tell him what to do, even though Snape knew he was right. Dumbledore outstretched his hand to help Snape up. Snape merely hissed at it before getting up alone. Accepting that Snape wouldn't accept physical contact if it could be helped, Dumbledore found a nearby stick about waist height and offered it to Snape as a walking aid. Snape accepted the obliging stick and leant on it heavily as they walked back to Hogwarts.  
  
The blood loss was causing Snape to feel very dizzy and disoriented. He focused hard to compute as to where he was. Madame Pomfrey's concerned face made the fact that he had reached the infirmary clear to him. Dumbledore and Mme Pomfrey's voices were heard some distance away, she said that Snape needed a blood transfusion and the thought of blood made Snape go weak & fall slightly before being remembered by Dumbledore, who helped him over to a free bed. Snape sat down upon it, still very weak, and his thoughts were very blurred and things being said could not stay in his head longer than a few seconds.  
  
"Lie down, Severus, you've just lost some blood, don't worry, we'll just give you a bit of a top up."  
  
But before Mme Pomfrey had finished, Snape had pass out.  
  
*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*  
  
*Vitrum is Latin for 'Glass'  
  
* Oculus is Latin for 'Eye'  
  
*Sanguis is Latin for 'Blood'  
  
*Macula is Latin for 'Blot' (I know it's pretty lame, but I couldn't find any of the words I originally wanted to use for this spell). 


End file.
